Stupid things people say. (Part 1)


1) “Life is short.”  BULLSHIT! Life is long. It is the longest thing you will ever do. I defy anyone to name one thing longer that everyone does for damn certain. (Mentions of the afterlife, no matter what variety you believe in, will be met with derision and scorn since they are all supposition and belief, not actual fact.)

2) “It was in the last place I looked.” Of course it was. No one keeps looking after they find what they are looking for.

 3) “Our relationship was good in the beginning.” This is ALWAYS said to justify hanging on to a bad relationship. It was obviously good in the beginning or it wouldn’t have become a relationship in the first place! However, two months of romantic bliss do not justify an abusive five-year relationship.

4) “I’m a good man.” This is the most useless thing a man can say. ALL MEN say this. Charles Manson said this. Ted Bundy said this. Hitler said this. OJ Simpson said this. Don’t say it…..just don’t say it.

5)”It’s complicated.” If you can’t decide if you’re single, married or in a relationship, either you’re remarkably stupid or you already have someone and want to add to the roster of people you can possibly fuck. Anyone who gets involved with someone who says this is an idiot…. or doesn’t mind being on a roster.

6) “I like to have fun.” Well, thank you, Captain Obvious. And here I was going through life with no pleasure or enjoyment at all! Of course you like to have fun! We all do. However, just saying that means NOTHING! What is your idea of fun? Skydiving? Competition Boggle? Horsehoes? Be fucking specific, people.

7) “I want a good man/woman.” Captain Obvious strikes again. Seriously, is specificity beyond people? How hard is it to describe your idea of a good man or woman? One man’s ‘good’ is another man’s ‘hell no’. If you don’t want to be stuck with some leftover, half-used, worn out ‘hell no’ make sure you know what you want and define that.

8 ) “Don’t judge a book by the cover”. Well on the surface, this seems reasonable. Then you realize that people aren’t books and that those who say this sort of thing are probably not worth the effort. Not everyone deserves a chance. You can tell by looking at some people if you wish to associate with them or not. People tend to tell who they are by how they dress and who they associate with. Go ahead. Judge that book by its cover.

9) “There’s someone for everyone.” Really. Got proof? I think this is self-comforthing bullshit of the first water. If there is someone for everyone, why do so many people die alone and lonely? How could anyone actually believe this piffle?

10) “Everythings always works out for the best.” Tell this to the woman who gets raped and winds up pregnant and HIV+ due to the attack. Who thinks up this shit?

Honestly, people, is it too much to expect you to THINK about what you say?


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